🔥 CHRONICLE OF A NIGERIAN HUSBAND – EPISODE 45
Topic: When “I’m Fine” Means You’re in Trouble
If there is one sentence that can shake a married man’s destiny, it is this one:
“I’m fine.”
Because in marriage, “I’m fine” is rarely fine.
It started on a calm evening.
I returned from work, greeted Amara, greeted Zara, even greeted the wall, but something was off.
Amara smiled… but it didn’t reach her eyes.
“Baby, how was your day?” I asked.
“Fine.”
That word landed with weight.
Normally, she would gist, who annoyed her, what Zara did, who called.
But that evening? Silence. Controlled silence.
I ate my food.
I washed my plate.
I even carried Zara.
Still… “fine.”
Later in the bedroom, I tried again.
“Are you sure everything is okay?”
She nodded.
“I’m fine, Chike.”
My spirit whispered: danger.
Because when a woman says she’s fine twice, she’s building a case.
I searched my memory like Google history.
Did I forget our anniversary? No.
Did I offend her mother? No.
Did I misplace baby wipes? Possibly… but not enough for this tension.
Finally, I sat beside her.
“Baby, talk to me. Whatever it is, we’ll handle it together.”
She sighed, the sigh that carries unsent paragraphs.
“Chike… you didn’t do anything wrong today. That’s the problem.
You’ve been physically present, but emotionally absent. You’re here, but your mind is at work, on your phone, somewhere else.”
That one entered my chest.
She wasn’t angry.
She was lonely.
“I miss you,” she said softly. “Even when you’re sitting next to me.”
I took her hand.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you felt this way. I’ll do better.”
She nodded.
“I don’t need perfection. I just need presence.”
That night, I dropped my phone.
I listened.
I stayed.
As Zara slept peacefully between us, I learned lessons marriage must teach gently, before it teaches painfully.
---
LESSONS LEARNED FROM EPISODE 45
1. “I’m fine” often means “I don’t feel seen.”
Learn to read the heart, not just the words.
2. Emotional absence hurts more than physical absence.
Being present is more than being in the same room.
3. Silence is not always peace, sometimes it’s exhaustion.
4. Listening without defending builds emotional safety.
5. A spouse doesn’t always want solutions; sometimes they want attention.
6. Small emotional neglects, when repeated, become big marital wounds.
7. Put down the phone. Look into your partner’s eyes. That’s connection.
8. Marriage thrives on daily presence, not occasional grand gestures.
9. Loneliness can exist even in love, presence is the cure.
10. Strong marriages are built when both partners feel noticed, heard, and valued.
---
To be continued...
(C) Cynthia Karibo
Topic: When “I’m Fine” Means You’re in Trouble
If there is one sentence that can shake a married man’s destiny, it is this one:
“I’m fine.”
Because in marriage, “I’m fine” is rarely fine.
It started on a calm evening.
I returned from work, greeted Amara, greeted Zara, even greeted the wall, but something was off.
Amara smiled… but it didn’t reach her eyes.
“Baby, how was your day?” I asked.
“Fine.”
That word landed with weight.
Normally, she would gist, who annoyed her, what Zara did, who called.
But that evening? Silence. Controlled silence.
I ate my food.
I washed my plate.
I even carried Zara.
Still… “fine.”
Later in the bedroom, I tried again.
“Are you sure everything is okay?”
She nodded.
“I’m fine, Chike.”
My spirit whispered: danger.
Because when a woman says she’s fine twice, she’s building a case.
I searched my memory like Google history.
Did I forget our anniversary? No.
Did I offend her mother? No.
Did I misplace baby wipes? Possibly… but not enough for this tension.
Finally, I sat beside her.
“Baby, talk to me. Whatever it is, we’ll handle it together.”
She sighed, the sigh that carries unsent paragraphs.
“Chike… you didn’t do anything wrong today. That’s the problem.
You’ve been physically present, but emotionally absent. You’re here, but your mind is at work, on your phone, somewhere else.”
That one entered my chest.
She wasn’t angry.
She was lonely.
“I miss you,” she said softly. “Even when you’re sitting next to me.”
I took her hand.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you felt this way. I’ll do better.”
She nodded.
“I don’t need perfection. I just need presence.”
That night, I dropped my phone.
I listened.
I stayed.
As Zara slept peacefully between us, I learned lessons marriage must teach gently, before it teaches painfully.
---
LESSONS LEARNED FROM EPISODE 45
1. “I’m fine” often means “I don’t feel seen.”
Learn to read the heart, not just the words.
2. Emotional absence hurts more than physical absence.
Being present is more than being in the same room.
3. Silence is not always peace, sometimes it’s exhaustion.
4. Listening without defending builds emotional safety.
5. A spouse doesn’t always want solutions; sometimes they want attention.
6. Small emotional neglects, when repeated, become big marital wounds.
7. Put down the phone. Look into your partner’s eyes. That’s connection.
8. Marriage thrives on daily presence, not occasional grand gestures.
9. Loneliness can exist even in love, presence is the cure.
10. Strong marriages are built when both partners feel noticed, heard, and valued.
---
To be continued...
(C) Cynthia Karibo
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